Not a week goes by without a news story that seems to focus on the ill-effects of unhealthy food. Last week the story was that obesity is, in terms of public health, as bad as climate change. I’m not actually sure if that’s true, unless all the fat people are going to be in the sea, which will obviously cause the sea levels to rise even further. The week before it was reported that the healthy school dinners initiative had failed (never mind Jamie Oliver, just carry on with keeping your missus permanently pregnant, it will take your mind off it). This week it turns out that individuals cannot be held responsible for obesity because apparently, we are not biologically evolved to cope with 21^st century life. I don’t think we’re mentally evolved to cope either, to be honest.

The reason I mention all this is because I have…